Now that PAX West 2009 is over and we are all hopefully snuggled back into our cubicles – we wanted to do something nice for our fans that didn’t make it to the show or those who just want a mid-Septembrus-pick-me-up.
So today is the first official day of the first annual “Haiku for Loot” contest with a prize award to the first five funny DeathSpank fans who respond to this first.
Post your best Haiku in the comments section by midnight, EST September 30, 2009 and we will send you some fine, memorable loot if you are a winner.
Official contest fine print can be found here.
UPDATE: The contest is officially closed, but make sure you check back for more opportunities to win some free stuff. Winners announced soonerish.
How long do I wait to drink or eat after using this?
Justice was dispensed.
Only one problem remains.
My thong migrates North.
Ay,With +3 Height
our ballsy hero strikes fear
Into feeble groins
Pioneer of death
Twisted genius gives birth to
Bloodbath comedies
Deathspank is the one;
Respect his absolute
awesomeness!
Crouch support
The meatballs are pink
I never loose my marbles
Deathspank growls madly
Sticks pen in sensei’s liver
“Your mom’s a Haiku”
Respect the awesomeness
of my banana hammock fears ness
or taste cold hard steel!
Deathspank sounds risque
Why not have a happy name
Like Fluffywhiskers
PART 1
Help me! I’m on Fire!
I see Deathspank! he’ll save me!
. . .
he’s peeing on me.
PART 2
This is my Kingdom.
Come Deathspank! I will knight thee!
Stop peeing on me!
This modern world scrapes
SCUMM from the 90s boot straps
…but in a good way.
Death follows behind,
Cloaked, bones clicking, scythe singing,
I owe him money
Finally some news
Deathspank has a new trailer
Undies of Justice
Only the first five?
Blast, looks like I’m out of luck
Still a fun contest.
a mighty thong worn
made of magicy stuff yeah
i hope i get blown
(away)
haw haw
Fighting for our time
Ron Gilbert will always win
We are not worthy
Winning loot for my kids
through gaming haikus
Hear me oh Spanker of Death!
DeathSpank the one
if he has a chicken with a wheel
Their enemies will pee
What is Deathspank?
It sounds like a band.
Whatever, I’m outta here.
The winter’s cold wind
Offends the mightiest man
When he wears a thong
A game so epic
controls so hard to master
DeathSpank just got pwn’d.
Only one hit he spanks,
he’ll cause countless of deaths.
Thousands of foes, rotting in grass…
Competent name – Deathspank,
he has…
Men envy his might
Women love his artifact
They call him Deathspank!
Rampaging fiercely
Destroying evil he finds
The hero: DeathSpank
Rampaging fiercely
Destroying evil he finds
The hero: DeathSpank!!!
Where is my thong?
Did it disappear?
One size does not fit all
Gilbert :
Don’t fear the death,
Just feel the spank!
In the Summer Heat
with Thong in my Hands
thy Sword Hangs in the Breeze
He came.
He saw.
He spanked.
Or was it the other way around…?
DeathSpank the One
if he has a chichken with a wheel
Their enemys will pee
Lock up all your loot,
Hide away your princesses,
DeathSpank is coming!
DeathSpank or Watheva
if he has a Chiken with a wheel
Their enemys Enemys will pee
DeathSpank or Watheva
if he has a chicken with a wheel
The Pirates will pee
Smitten by my boot
All goblins turn into loot
Awe, Blood and Corpses!
Goblin killed,
or should i say
Deathspanked!
Deathspank smote!
pirates quivered
goblins fainted, puzzles solved.
why do pirates keep
their scurvy loot in barrels?
no one really knows
My sword ‘Eversmite’
Would end you if it were not
Stuck in its scabbard
Oh Great Deathspank
In your thong we trust
Give us loot and a hard spank
From winter till fall
Deathspank kills all
Awesomness
Nice idea for a contest!
Do we have to register somewhere to enter?
Oh, Ron! Mighty god!
Send us DeathSpank, our savior,
to smite all boredom.
fighting fearful hordes
solving all your hard puzzles
DeathSpank, great hero
Deathspank shall be this:
The best game since ninety one.
Ron Gilberts the one!