What is DeathSpank: Thongs of Virtue?

Now the star of two major Action RPGs: DeathSpank and DeathSpank: Thongs of Virtue; DeathSpank is off on a new adventure, searching the world for the six mystical Thongs of Virtue.
He’s saved the orphans, now it’s time for the underwear!
That didn’t sound right.
Anyway, in his travels DeathSpank has brought justice to the downtrodden, faced the riddle of bacon and defeated evils so horrible they would make just plain evil lose its lunch. DeathSpank: Thongs of Virtue is a hilarious adventure full of violence, sorcery and war-metaphors! And it’s fun! Remember fun? You hit things with swords, blow things up with magical bazookas, zap foes with Tesla Rods or chuck Fire hand grenades at their big stupid dumb heads (I know, fire hand grenades seem redundant, but trust me, they’re cool).

What platforms will DeathSpank: Thongs of Virtue be available on?

Two of them.
Oh, what?
Okay. So far Xbox LIVE Arcade and PlayStation Network have been announced. Thing is though, we really love getting money, We can’t stress that enough. So we want to bring DeathSpank to as many people as possible. Subscribe to our RSS feed and our #HotheadGames twitter feed or visit here often to catch any new announcements. In the meantime while you’re waiting for DeathSpank: Thongs of Virtue be sure to buy the first game, DeathSpank now.

What is the release date?

So you need a release date do you? Again? Darn you people are needy. How about September 21st for PlayStation Network and September 22nd for Xbox LIVE Arcade! Does that work for you?

How much will it cost?

How much have you got on you? Joke.
But seriously, we love charging for things! In fact we love charging 1200 points on XBoxLive Arcade or $14.99 real American dollars on PlayStation Network! Alternatively you can sign over your power of attorney to Hothead games, I hear it’s pretty easy to set up, and we provisionally promise to take care of your children and pets for a period of no more than 5 years — what have you got to lose? (Don’t really do that last thing).

What is the world of DeathSpank: Thongs of Virtue like?

I’m not going to lie, it’s mostly brown. There are trees and houses and things, but a lot of them are brown too. It’s not like Gears of War brown, but I’m just trying to be up front with you people.
Thanks to all the cost savings due to brownness, the world is very, very big. There are even areas that are not brown, like the North Pole, which is…white. Or the ocean which is…aw hell, you know.
Anyway, if I had to pick one word to describe the world of DeathSpank (which was not “brown”) it would be: “really, really a lot of hard work to make.”

What sort of quests will DeathSpank: Thongs of Virtue have?

I can’t remember anymore, but there’s a lot of them. I mean, didn’t you read the first FAQ? I’m always repeating myself. Didn’t I just build you two huge freakin’ games? Can’t I take a rest?
Fine: there are kill quests, gather quests, defend things quests, destroy things quests, protect people quests, recover Bearalope bits quests, disable radio tower quests, shoot nuns quests, recover the lost idol quests, defeat sentient super-computers quests, insult the delusional human-dressed-as-a-Leprechaun quests, blow up ultra-mega-bomb quests, drive a firework shooting galleon quests and cook Spanky’s Delight quests. I’m sure there’s a quest quest in there as well, but I don’t have the print-outs in front of me.

Will DeathSpank: Thongs of Virtue have special “boss” fights?

Are the toilet habits of southern European religious pontiffs centered around areas filled with large evergreen plants?
DeathSpank has a wide variety of enemies for you to engage and kill including mighty bosses! If there’s a character that’s driven you crazy you’ll get a chance to kill it. Is there an exciting new weapon that you’ve been saving for ‘just the right enemy’? Well that enemy is waiting for you in DeathSpank. These bosses are huge, powerful and tricky, forcing DeathSpank to defeat them with brute force or sneaky guile! They also smell and have a poor understanding of grammar. You’ll have to take our word on the last bit, but trust us, they’re jerks.

How does character advancement work?

Very well, thank you.
You want more details huh?
Shocking.
DeathSpank kills enemies and complete quests to level up. A leveled up DeathSpank gains improved stats, the ability to use new weapons, get new hero card powers or even swanky titles like “Hater of the Heinous” and “Wearer of Armor”. He is also a tiny bit taller and his facial hair grows faster*.
*Not available on any platforms.

What kind of items will I be able to find in DeathSpank: Thongs of Virtue?

Well, lots of them are hand-held, for starters. Imagine your favorite World-War-Wild-West-North Pole-Pirate-Commando-Ninja. What would he be wearing or carrying? All that stuff. I’m pretty sure…yeah. All of that stuff. Magical bazookas. YAY!

Is there a place for me to store items besides my backpack?

Yes, the ‘lost and found’ box! Say you’re in the heat of battle and overlook something important like your mother’s birthday card, that card will then later magically be in the lost and found waiting for you! How does it get there you ask?
Well in the original DeathSpank it was Elves. So in DeathSpank: Thongs of Virtue it is…um…what do you call those little monsters that ruin airplanes? You know. They had like a movie or two in the 80’s? Those things.

Will monsters scale in level with my character?

Do you mean emotionally?  Oh. Um. Combat! Yeah, enemies become more difficult (non-emotionally) as you travel through the world. The deeper you travel into the unknown expanses of the map, the more fascinating creatures you meet, and then, um…make…die. DeathSpank: Thongs of Virtue is jam-packed with a ton of new enemies, monsters and beasties for DeathSpank to escort from this mortal coil with blood-curdling violence.

How long does it take to complete the game?

In Earth units?Let’s say 15. Yeah, a good solid 15. 15 what you may ask? Aha!
…15 hours, okay? So much for art. 15 hours. Jeez. If you’re super special, and you skip ALL OUR HARD WORK, you could probably swing it in 10. (But don’t be that guy)

What can I do once I finish the main storyline?

What can’t you do once you finish the main storyline! I mean outside the game nearly anything is possible, except a few things! Like what?  Well, for one, you can’t go back in time and stop World War II — that ship has SAILED buddy. You can’t invest in IBM in 1951 because you probably weren’t even alive! I mean, theoretically, yes, you could, if you could go back in time, but then the whole quantum dimensional shift thing comes into play. It’s confusing. Hm. I seem to have drifted off the point. Oh, you meant what can I do once I finish the main storyline IN THE GAME? Why didn’t you say so?  How about a round of exciting couch co-op? You can even try to complete the more than a hundred side quests that pester the huge world of DeathSpank Thongs of Virtue. You can compete with your many online friends on our expansive leaderboards. Maybe you’ll even buy a second copy of the second game and beat that one too!

What sort of background music will there be?

Loud music. No seriously. Ear-numbingly loud. Really, really, really loud. I’m just kidding, it’s just like the first game. Here’s the text from the first FAQ (since you’re too darn lazy to go there). “Imagine a small responsive rock band following DeathSpank around. The enemies are some instruments, DeathSpank is others and I guess the quests are the groupies. DeathSpank’s music is unique and catchy, the sort of thing you’ll use as ringtones from the moment you hear it. If you’re not humming happily after playing this game you should get your ears checked because we have amazing music.”

What will the download size for DeathSpank: Thongs of Virtue be?

Complicated question. Let me just walk you through this. Let’s say you were on a train, heading for Chicago at 65 MPH and you were 355 miles from the station, and a bird — a finch — was flying in the other direction at 12 MPH, and then the bird hit the train head-on and splattered all over the place: Wouldn’t that be sad?…what?

Will there be a demo?

For our game? Heck yeah. There’s already a demo for the first game. But that wasn’t enough, so we’re like here’s the demo for the second game too! BOOYAH! Did I just blow your mind? YEAH!  Please buy our game. And this time there will be a PS3 demo for regions outside of North America!

Will there be a boxed version?

What is a box, really? People can be boxed in by expectations, they can be boxed in like cattle, they can have boxed perspectives. But what is a box? And once you know what a box is, can DeathSpank, like, fit in it? I guess that depends on how big DeathSpank is in comparison to the box. Bigger? Smaller? There’s a lot of questions. It’s a confusing and exciting time. So…I’m just gonna go ahead and say yes. But before you get too excited, I’m going to put a little caveat in there: the box might only be in my mind. Seriously though, I don’t know. I hope so. Almost everything I’ve ever owned came in a box. A DeathSpank: Thongs of Virtue box…yeah, that’d be SWEET.

How about a collector’s version?

I just work here, here’s the other press release: “our much beloved/feared publisher has all sorts of plans for giving people bonus content through an exciting variety of means. This is our way of saying we don’t know!?”

What languages will DeathSpank: Thongs of Virtue be localized into?

Is American a language? There are accents, does that count?

What’s new in DeathSpank: Thongs of Virtue?

Lots and lots and lots of things: expensive things, big things, dangerous things, wild things. Things you beat other things to death with, things with things in them which shoot out and stab things in the neck. Basically a lot of new stuff is in the game. Hm… I’m drawing a blank.
SHIP! Oh yeah, there’s a ship and um… machine guns, bazookas…FLAMETHROWER.
THERE IS A FLAMETHROWER IN THE GAME.
Mmmmm…TNT? Did I say that yet? Lots of things that blow up in general, really. And there’s a SPACESUIT!
Dude. Seriously.
Um…
What was the question again?